31.05.2012, 18:50
palblog :: Blast from the Past #544: April 6, 2007: Re: TMNT 150 2nd Draft, Re: TMNT 150 2nd Draft and Re: TMNT Show 152 Outline :: 31.05.2012 18:42
Subj: Re: TMNT Show 152 Outline
Date: Friday, April 6, 2007 1:21:48 PM
From: Peter Laird
To: Lloyd Goldfine
notes on Ep. 152 outline
1.) Re: the following:
"
At the Pan Galactic Alliance Great Hall, it is an exciting day. The Peace Conference that Splinter had been helping Bishop with has finally come to fruity."
This is one of those typos/misspellings that got me laughing. "Fruity"? I believe the word is "fruition".
2.) Re: the following:
"
At the Mall, Criminals scatter out of the prison ship, breaking things, stealing things, and generally causing a real panic at the mall. But there’s something up. Two criminals fall next to shadows. What’s going on?"
Yes... what is going on? It's not made clear here. Is this Mike striking from the shadows? If so, then why a few lines later do we have this:
"
From above the mall –
Michelangelo: “Beware, Evil Doers! You now face the wrathful wrath of the Turtle Titan!”
3.) It seems pretty odd that we don't see the Turtles and Splinter from the time that they are sucked into the prison ship until the moment when the prison ship is in the river and they escape with Mike's help. What have they been doing in the meantime? If Triple Threat is smart/resourceful enough to find a way to escape from the prison ship, would it not stand to reason that the other three Turtles and Splinter would too?
4.) Where are the Peacekeepers all this time? I would think a prison ship taken over by convicts would get their attention.
5.) I'm not loving OR hating this story, but it is missing something. RIght now, it just feels like a lot of running/jumping/falling down with no real purpose.
It occurs to me that perhaps something interesting might be done with the whole "peace settlement" thing. As Triple Threat's silly "list of evil things to do" never really feels all that threatening (more annoying and "accidentally dangerous"), perhaps the REAL threat here could come from the two sides whose diplomats have been kidnapped. Each side could think that it is a plot by the other, and they could be preparing to mobilize their forces (maybe they have a few warships in Earth orbit) to start fighting, and that's what provides the real motivation for our heroes to straighten things out... and Triple Threat and his gang's slapstick-criminal antics just complicate the matter.
-- Pete
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Последний раз редактировалось RayCrit; 31.07.2012 в 08:16.